This unemployed high school drop out was the real deal. We lovingly referred to him now as “The Jackhammer.” After sleeping with both me and my best friend, it was quickly established that he was in fact the worst lay possible. This considerate fellow liked to ask what color you’d like before he sat awkwardly at the end of the bed (hiding the monster that lies between his legs), while he tried unsuccessfully to slip on the color condom of your choice. He then barreled into you at what can only be referred to as mach speed. After the initial 45 seconds, he liked to pull out so he didn’t “go too soon.” I don’t know what was worse, the fact that he remained huddled over you during break time, or that the break repeated itself 20 seconds later. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a real ladies man – that is, if you like to pay for his breakfast the next morning.
Browse Timeline
Comments ( 1 Comment )
oh man! i think i know this dude. does his name start with an N?
lamarr added these pithy words on
Feb 19 10 at
11:22 pm
